Did you hear the one about the optimist who accidentally fell from the roof of the 100 storey building? Someone down on the 50th floor heard them falling past an open window saying: “So Far So Good!”
On Saturday I witnessed an historic event – two South African Rugby teams playing in a Super 14 final at the Orlando Stadium in Soweto. It was amazing to see the stadium full of cheering Rugby Fans, the cacophony of droning Vuvuzelas, the colourful Makarapas and president Zuma pitching up on the pitch to greet the players before kick-off. For an optimist like me, this was a significant event, one which brought back powerful emotional memories of Rugby World Cup 1995. (Although back then my team won the game…)
Of course the pessimists will say it was a non event, a sham, nothing more than a short lived publicity stunt for political gain. The realists will say it was only a rugby game; South Africa has much more pressing (and depressing) issues to overcome.
Henry Ford once said: If you think you can or you think you can’t – you are right. I think the same applies to belief in the future success of our country – if you think we can or you think we can’t – you are right! It depends upon whether you are a pessimist, optimist or realist.
Right now, the pessimists are having a field day regarding South Africa. Like Karoo sheep they will bleat about Crime, Corruption, Malema, Zuma, The Erosion of Land Rights, Senseless Farm Murders, the Crumbling Justice System, Poor Service Delivery, Nationalisation of Mines, Unemployment and Cadre Deployment et al.
And they are absolutely RIGHT! Every one of these issues is evidence of their being right. We face massive challenges, challenges which the pessimists believe we as a nation will not be able to overcome. They insist that our country, like the optimist who fell off the building, is falling rapidly towards a major disaster. In their opinion it’s only a matter of time before the mango really hits the fan. They repeatedly tell the optimists to get out of denial and start facing the grim reality of what in their opinion is the inevitable decline of another African economy. Just look at the evidence from up north they say, from Mad Bob to Gaddafi and in between, to see where we are going to end up.
The optimists, on the other hand, have to range far and wide (just like Karoo sheep) to find meagre pickings of hope. After some reflection they might mention our Rapidly Improving Infrastructure, Major Intersections Being Rebuilt, Awesome New Airports, The Gautrain, Bus Rapid Transit System, Tax Collection Efficiency, Our Stable Currency, Declining Inflation, Solid Banking System and Our Free Press. Not to mention that we are about to host the biggest sporting event in the world right now. They will ask if you have noticed the side mirror socks and SA flags on so many cars, showing a growing groundswell of support for Bafana Bafana to play their hearts out and make ALL OF US proud.
The optimists may also remind you to take a good look at the overall state of our economy today, compared to 1994, as evidence of how far we have come as a nation.
And THEY too, are absolutely RIGHT. Every one of these points is a real reason to believe, a reason to feel positive that we as a nation can survive, thrive and succeed. Each one of these are real achievements, concrete evidence that we can get things done and make significant progress, despite our many challenges.
And what of the realists? They will most likely take another perspective, a look at the bigger picture and ask 3 vital questions:
- How is S.A. REALLY doing?
- How is the REST OF THE WORLD doing in comparison?
- What sort of shape is our whole PLANET in right now?
Some answers they may give us would be:
- How are we really doing? Realistically, we are doing OK, with lots to be proud of and lots to be concerned about, in equal measure. It really comes down to a question of what you choose to focus on. More importantly, it comes down to what each of us is actually doing to make things better. Worrying achieves nothing; it simply creates stress, fear and negativity. Waiting for a political solution is a waste of valuable time. Taking action to make a difference breeds real change, positivity and optimism.
- How is the rest of the world doing? Thailand just had 88 deaths due to Political infighting in Bangkok. Europe is facing a major Euro currency crisis. Greece and Spain (and probably more to come) are in deep financial trouble. So deep that France is threatening to pull out of the Eurozone. Britain has lost faith in their politicians. Every sixth child in Germany is on welfare. Volcanic ash is causing regular mayhem over parts of Europe. A friend recently returned from a 2 week driving holiday in Italy. He tells me that they have numerous, massive potholes which make ours seem tiny by comparison. The USA is facing its biggest oil spill disaster ever. They also found a large, (malfunctioning) car bomb in Times Square on 1st May. And they still owe around US $ 400 trillion to somebody – the world’s largest budget deficit? Australia faces issues like refugee boats, teen pregnancy and major drug abuse among their youth. A recent survey found that the Aussie population feels that their government is interfering way too much in all aspects of their lives. Sound familiar?
- What about our planet? Right now, she is struggling with a nett population growth of some 200 000 new humans per day – that’s an extra 1 million every five days. We are literally swarming like ants and the impact is showing. So we are seeing global warming, earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanoes and other planetary disruptions. Some even say that the melting ice caps could affect the delicate weight balance and cause earth to shift on her axis – then we will see some major SHI(F)T happen – in our lifetime!
And as I write all of this, I can hear the pessimists bleating again: SO WHAT Mark, two wrongs don’t make a right, get with the program, who cares about the rest of the world when our country is going to the dogs?
Listen ouens, I am only going to say this once: The world is your oyster and you can choose to go and live anywhere you like. The choices are vast. The truth is that WHEREVER YOU GO, YOU TAKE YOURSELF WITH YOU! You will still wake up every day and have to look in the mirror at your optimistic, pessimistic or realistic face. And if you have reason to complain about SA, you will most likely find as many reasons to complain about your new country, your neighbours, politicians, the weather, rising prices, bureaucracy, traffic, systems, language and food et al. Granted you will probably feel safer and more secure regarding violent crime, but will you feel HAPPY? Happiness comes from within and everywhere you go you will still face challenges. Different challenges maybe, but no less difficult to overcome.
And what of feeling secure? Helen Keller said: “Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”
I am somewhat concerned about the future of our planet. I do not always feel 100% safe in my country right now. But I am 100% happy and confident it will improve. My life has always been a daring adventure. And, most importantly, I am doing something positive to make a difference instead of sitting around waiting for the world to change. Every month, I work with hundreds of my countrymen to improve their attitudes, productivity, optimism, efficiency, profitability, motivation and team work. At the workplace, I see people of all colours, religions and creeds, male and female, old and young, integrating and working together to make things better. I see the shift happening amongst leaders, staff and their customers. On Saturday, in Soweto, I saw that shift begin to happen socially, outside the workplace, in the townships, which is where the real work still needs to be done. I saw the birth of hope.
On selected weekends, I assist groups of brave individuals to take a profound journey deep inside and discover what distorted beliefs are running their lives. I witness “strangers” sharing their true feelings with other “strangers” and thereby becoming friends. I see people dropping their masks and prejudices, being completely authentic with others and thereby undergoing profound transformation, like caterpillars becoming butterflies. I see hope being restored and deep human bonds being formed, regardless of race or age or religious belief. I see the light begin to shine from within, as we strip away the darkness of depression, fear, self loathing and negative conditioning. I see extreme pessimists make a complete pendulum swing through realism to optimism. It is the most rewarding work I have ever done in my life.
All of the above gives me joy and makes my life meaningful. It gives me reason to believe, because I SEE IT HAPPEN. I do not read the newspapers, because they mostly tell me what is going wrong. I remain focused on what is REALLY GOING ON, and find that there is much to be optimistic about. I realise that it is up to each individual to first change themselves and then help others do the same, if we are to have a safer, kinder, more conscious and compassionate world.
Woodrow Wilson said: “You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand.”
Our own Johnny Clegg sang: It’s a CRUEL, CRAZY, BEAUTIFUL world. I believe the world appears to be Cruel to the Pessimists, Crazy to the Realists and Beautiful to the Optimists.
Which one are you?
Tags: Be Positive, Create Your Own Happiness, Make South Africa Better, South African Optimism
Today, we remember the release from prison 20 years ago of Madiba, our beloved statesman, inspirational leader and all round good oke. Some remember with joy, others with anger. (Some don’t remember at all.) I recall around the time of his release having many lively arguments with my soon to be father in law. We would sit in front of the TV as the news unfolded, him older angry and fearful, me younger, excited and hopeful. Two white South Africans with completely different expectations of the same event. One optimist and one pessimist, both wanting to be proven right. And we were. I was adamant that Mandela’s release meant the end of apartheid and a vital new beginning for SA. He was just as adamant that his release meant the beginning of the end for all of us.
Well it is now 20 years on, and here we are my boet.
And tonight our president will take a break from impregnating the women of our nation to impregnate us with pride in what we have achieved in 20 years. The king of swing will fill us in on what is happening. Apparently he will speak to us in his capacity as head of state not head of government. Security would be advised to check the podium beforehand in case someone is hiding in there to give him some head. Anyway, let’s move ahead.
In case you are unable to tune in at 7pm, here is a brief summary of the state of the nation:
Dear friends
The nation is in a state. A state of change, a state of confusion, a state of emancipation, a state of anticipation. Our roads are in a hell of a state. Some of the Free State is underwater. Let me state categorically that all of these states are merely pigments of your imagination. Here are the actual facts:
- Vehicle hijackings have decreased. However, the whole country has been hijacked by FIFA for a good part of 2010.
- Crime is down but fear of crime has increased thanks to the negative media and UK company Protektorvest offering knife proof vests to soccer tourists.
- The Garden Route is parched and Gauteng is flooded.
- The recession is still causing a fair amount of depression.
- The stock market stinks. The rand is looking pretty grand.
- The gap between rich and poor has increased, as it has in many other similar countries in the world.
- Cape Town has just been voted one of the top 6 most beautiful cities in the world by Forbes magazine.
- We still have some of the bluest skies in the world.
- The new soccer stadiums are magnificent and reason to be proud
- Cadbury’s chocolate is still way better than any imported Swiss stuff.
- Mrs Balls could be the funniest name for a food company in the world.
- We have not lost our innate ability to laugh at ourselves.
What makes our nation so special is that we live life to the full, every minute, every hour, every day. We suck the marrow from the bones of life and seize the day, (because we never know if we will still be alive tomorrow.) Our lives are rich, complex, challenging and interesting. We speak 11 different languages yet strive to be one nation. Somehow, despite the odds, we manage to unite in crisis and support each other. We also try to help the rest of the world, with organisations such as Gift of the Givers making a major contribution in Haiti.
There is something so special about this country and its people. I cannot articulate what it is because it is ethereal, energetic, emotional and indescribable. But those who live here and those who visit us can sense it, feel it, experience it. It is the combined energy of 358 years of history – turbulent, violent, passionate and pioneering. It is the hopes and dreams born in the dusty townships and corporate boardrooms. It is the tremendous, ground breaking innovations and inventions like Heart Transplants, CAT scan machines, Oil from Coal, 128 bit security encryption, the Kreepy Krauly, Vuvuzela and Vuyo’s Wors. It is our honesty, our creativity, our humility and our tenacity that make me proud to be a citizen of this great nation.
This is the state of the nation. We are not the United States but we stand united.
Now that’s AYOBA!
Tags: Jacob Zuma, State of the nation
150 Delegates fill the room, waiting in anticipation for the day’s motivational program to begin. I stand at the back of the crowd, all miked up and ready to strut my stuff. Before introducing me, the MC announces a special guest singer from the Cape Flats and invites the audience to stand. They pick up little pieces of paper containing the words to our anthem “Nkosi Sikelel’ iAfrika”. With no backing music, the singer begins the anthem, her beautiful voice hauntingly leading the group in emotional song. Without warning, tears begin to roll down my face. Tears of joy, tears of pride, tears of gratitude. I am reminded, once again, why I love these people, this Country, this Continent of Africa.
I recall singing the “old” anthem at school with no passion, going through the motions, feeling no emotion at all. I remember how just a few years ago, many South Africans resisted the new anthem, refusing to accept the modified version. And I realise how far we have come, when the nation unites in indignation at the butchering of the anthem by brother Ras Dumisani in France.
I recall the comments that our new flag was too colourful and busy and looked like a pair of Y-Front underpants. Today I see our flag flown with pride at events such as the FIFA world cup pool draw, watched by hundreds of millions of people worldwide. I see a nation, at once troubled and divided, uniting behind our new symbols reflecting unity, diversity and the desire for a better life.
And as the year draws to a close, I feel the fatigue of a long 12 months. My first reaction is to think it has been an “Annus Horribilus” (Latin for Horrible Year.) But as you know, it is in my nature to seek the positives and see the glass as half full. So I take a deep breath and make time to really reflect upon what has been positive and what I am grateful for. It is at first difficult, my thoughts are blocked. Then suddenly, surprisingly, a stream of positives begins to flow through my mind. Briefly, here are some of them:
On a personal note:
- I am grateful that my business has actually improved through the downturn and emerged leaner as a result, ready to capitalise on the upturn when it comes.
- I am grateful to all my loyal customers, who have continued to support me even though their training budgets have been slashed. Thank you so much!
- I am grateful to our IT Guy, who organised our database, redesigned the website and demystified many of our IT challenges. Thanks Francois.
- I am grateful to my Consciousness Coach, who taught me that if we hold an important question in mind for long enough; we will become the living answer to that question. Thanks Michele.
- I am grateful to the founders of World Alive, for designing the most powerful personal development program available in South Africa and electing me to run the Cape Town Office. Thank you for believing in me.
- I am grateful to my wife and family, who have continued to support me in my journey to make a difference. I love you guys so much.
- I am grateful to my peers and colleagues, who continually challenge and support me to reach greater heights of awareness.
- I am grateful to you who read my newsletters, and give me so much valuable feedback. THANK YOU!
- I am grateful that this year has caused me to deeply evaluate what is really important and where to spend more of my quality time.
On a broader scale:
- I am grateful that humanity is realising how urgently we need to make dramatic changes to save this precious planet. I am confident that humankind has the intelligence and creativity to find ways to do this.
- I am grateful that we still have some honest policemen who risk their lives every day, for very little pay, in order to protect us.
- I am grateful for the teachers, doctors and nurses in public service who believe that making a difference and serving others is more important than money.
- I am grateful that we still have some officials and politicians (yes we do!) who fulfil the role of being public servants without greedily stuffing their pockets. Thank goodness for you!
How about you? Have you taken the time to reflect upon what you can be grateful for? Can you identify the positives from the past year? Or are you stuck in the belief that it was all bad?
The trick is to step outside the box, to go deep within and ask the question: What went right this year? For me, my relationships, my personal growth, my business, the country, the planet. What did I learn, how did I grow? What will I do differently next year as a result?
Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude. It makes you more positive and opens up space for you to receive more. It is better to have a little, and appreciate it a lot, than to have a lot and appreciate it a little (or not at all!)
In closing, I wish you and your loved ones a safe, relaxing and joyful festive season.
Please drive safely – enjoy the Ride! Remember that statistically you are 300 times more likely to die in a motor vehicle accident than as the victim of a violent incident in South Africa.
Tags: 2009, Attitude of Gratitude, National Anthem, Proudly South African
Howzit
I don’t know about you but it has become patently obvious to me that I am addicted to my inbox. I reckon that I click on send/receive at least 30 times per day. It is a powerful and absorbing thing, this internet and its related technologies. I was planning to book into a rehab centre till I learned that a Chinese lightie of 15 was recently BEATEN TO DEATH whilst attending an internet addicts boot camp. The Skynews article also notes that China has the world’s largest internet population, with almost 300 million users, and that they have more than 200 organisations offering treatment for web addiction. Only last month, the nation banned electro-shock therapy as a treatment for the problem. How’s that for harsh my China?
Anyway, back to Boerewors Country. Almost everyone I know spends large chunks of their valuable time staring hypnotically into their computer monitor. Or Blackberry, or i Phone, or Omnia or Palm or PDA. Or Playstation, PSP, X Box or Wii. Or the blerrie TV. We cannot escape being sucked into the information vortex. But what are we seeing in front of us, what information is really being delivered here? To be honest it’s mostly irrelevant twak, which does very little to enhance our already stressed lives.
Let’s check out the most common items up for grabs on the techno-buffet:
Email:
I am a very lucky dude. Every day I win millions of Euros in the lotto and can easily buy Fake Rolexes, Top Quality University Degrees, Wonderful Weight Loss Products, Sensual Massages, Penis Enlargers, Viagra and of course Niagra (the female version of Viagra.) Based upon the number of mails I have received in the past 12 months, at least 263 897 people believe my male member is undersized. And this is just in my Junk Mail Folder!
In my inbox, I have 6 507 896 365.33 newsletters, invoices, unread mails, awaiting action tasks, jokes and worst of all, soppy inspirational pieces. In fact, if I see one more “pass this on to your 10 worst enemies and you will be eternally doomed” email involving flowery words accompanied by lame ducks, cute kids, amiable animals, planets, forests, lakes, mountains or flowers, I am going to throw up all over my keyboard. Sies man.
Internet:
I really love Google. They have allowed me to access the world’s largest library with fast, intelligent searching. Internet Banking allows me to manipulate my meagre money matters to my heart’s content. Have you realised that your money has become an illusion floating in cyberspace? Because you never actually get to see very much of it for real.
For buying and selling almost anything gumtree is a truly awesome site. And online airticket and movie bookings have become a breeze. I also enjoy Youtube come to think of it. And have you heard the SA version of Lady Ga Ga’s Pokerface? It’s called Pap en Vleis and it’s really funny.
Of course the energy I spend on all of these sites leaves me no time to waste on the millions of social networking tools like Blogs, Twitter, Linked In, Plaxo and Facebook (OK – I’ll admit I stumble reluctantly into FB about once per month) I also never get to visit the News Channels and Chat Forums and Flash Games and Celebrity Slobberers and Sleazy Porn Sites. Blind ek se! But hey, here is a Real Newsflash – I just learned that you can now watch the daily news delivered to you by naked people! Yes, if you are over 18, not too prudish and keen for a different angle on the news dangle, click here.
Playstation:
My 9 year old son is already able to kill 2 374 of the enemy per hour. He has thumbs like vice grips. Yet recently, I watched in awe as my wife quickly covered his eyes when a pair of naked female breasts flashed across on our TV screen. I tried to reason with her that our son was far more likely to see real live boobs one day than actually kill somebody, so why not let him have a good look in preparation? Give him a head start so to speak. She told me to shut up and so we agreed to disagree on this touchy issue.
T.V.
I mostly watch rugby, my wife watches movies and my kids watch cartoon network. I tried to watch Ed, Ed and Eddie once but almost had an epileptic fit. None of us watches the news ever, it’s just too damn depressing. Soap Operas are also banned in our household – who wants to stare vacuously whilst drooling at “Days of other people’s lives?” DSTV continues to dish us up miles and miles of nothingness. Why don’t they let us choose our 10 or fifteen favourite shows – allow us to design a custom bouquet which we will really enjoy, for a reduced fee? Catch a wake up you Monopolistic Monolith!
Cellphones:
I smaak the Apple i-Phone stukkend –you can do absolutely anything with it. (Except make a simple phone call.) The Blackberry is now known as the crackberry because it is so addictive. I hate meetings involving people with Blackberrys cause they don’t pay me much attention – their shifty eyes and surreptitious toggly fingers are very distracting. Meanwhile my new Nokia takes photo’s and synchronises my contacts and diary through blueteeth with my laptop which is wirelessly connected to my WAN which uses an ADSL pipe to connect to the world wide wiki. Kan jy dit glo my Bru!!!
Relaxation:
Ja well no fine. So what do we do to relax, find balance and switch off from all this attractive and addictive technology? Here are some ideas:
- I have been told to read 2 great books and I intend to do so just as soon as I can find the time. They are: the 4 Hour Workweek and Take back your LIFE.
- Download a simple, powerful relaxation exercise from my website by clicking here. It’s free!
- Resolve to only click send and receive only twice per day. Or automatically at 2 hour intervals (Easier said than done).
- Set appointments with yourself for exercise, relaxation, vacation and family time etc. I colour code mine green in Outlook, so I can visually see if my life is balanced.
- Read a non-fiction book which uplifts you. Click here for my recommended reading booklist.
- Plan a weekend away or holiday – do it NOW (use the internet)
- Invest / spend / live some quality time with your kids.
- Tell a loved one how much they mean to you.
- Listen to uplifting music.
- Attend my one hour Presentation, Winning Ways to Work Smarter, or my one day Workshop on Time Management.
Also, if you have a moment to mail me, I would love to hear about how you deal with all these technology issues and what actions you are taking to balance your life.
Have to go now – my inbox is calling me. “I’m coming honey……”
Till next time
Braai Braai
Mark
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Tags: Addicted to My Inbox, Internet Addiction, Relaxation, Time Management, Work Smarter
