Is it just me or did this year simply fly by, like an illegal taxi at a roadblock?

And what an exceptional year it has been. We have been blissfully busy working with two types of organisations: Those fighting the Price Wars and those who are winning the Strategic Battles.

Those fighting the price war are despondent, depressed, distraught and demotivated. They are GATVOL of the China Factor, Commoditisation, Globalisation, Financial Turmoil, Uncertainty, Indecisiveness, Aggressive Competitors and Endless Economic woes. (Ja dit is WOES!) They are tired of battling in the trenches, cutting prices to the bone, losing margin, juggling cashflow, getting their butts whipped by the opposition and not getting their damn credit applications approved. They call us in to equip their tired troops with new sales weapons and ammunition to go out and win the war.

Those winning the strategic sales battle are creative, upbeat, profitable, focussed and steadily growing market share. They are changing the rules, adding value, go-giving and delivering true customer service – not just lip service! These organisations call us in to strategise, train, coach, strengthen and enhance their already excellent sales armoury.

I hope that you are winning the strategic battle. If so, keep on fighting the smart fight. If however, you are still fighting a war, here are some tips to make real SHIFT HAPPEN for you and your organisation:

1. Stop trying to help your customers save money and start helping them to make more profit. Obviously all companies want to save on expenses, especially in these tough times, but their reason for doing that is to ultimately make more profit. Your strategy must be
to become their trusted advisor and show them genuine ways to become more profitable through working with you. They will then perceive you and your organisation as valuable business partners and therefore stop asking you for unreasonable, margin destroying discounts.

2. Stop Cold Calling and Start Going Fishing. Cold calling is scary, degrading, energy sapping and in most cases a real battle. Fishing is so much more relaxing and rewarding. To fish successfully for increased sales requires that you think strategically about: WHERE to fish, WHEN to fish, WHAT fish to target, what size TACKLE to employ and, most importantly, what BAIT to use. And it is important to remember that you need to exercise a little patience whilst perfecting the art of making consistently big catches.

3. Stop Telling and Start Selling. Your potential customers don’t care about your boring business card, company brochure, vision & mission, accolades, track record, achievements and awards. They care about the fact that you really care (about them and THEIR business) and are able to visibly and consistently demonstrate this caring in every interaction. Develop the art of strategic questioning and active listening to truly get inside their head and heart. Become a professional note taker and develop some form of CRM system to stay in contact. Then watch the deal close all by itself.

4. Develop an Effective Sales Strategy. This is the most important part of the whole plan. You develop an organisational and / or individual sales strategy to equip you for winning the sales battle. This requires you to do the hard work upfront which makes selling easy thereafter. There are many types of sales strategy. I will cover just four of them briefly:

• The “GameBreaker” Strategy.This is when you reinvent the game, re-write the rules, turn everything on its head and thoroughly piss off your competition. Think about how Outsurance completely revolutionised the short term insurance industry. Discovery Vitality did the same for the medical aid industry and Google used it to redefine the search engine space. This strategy requires real “out of the box” thinking, a healthy dose of confidence and the courage to take a calculated risk. The good news is that if cleverly designed, it does not need to cost a lot of money to be implemented with great effect.
• The Go Giving Strategy.We were all taught to be go-getters in sales. Go and get your foot in the door, get to the decision taker, get the deal, and get the commission. Whatever it takes. And what is this strategy getting us right now – zip – that’s what! To develop a successful Go Giving strategy, we need to ask a simple question: “What are we leaving behind after every interaction, which is really valuable to the customer and / or their business?” Is it information, tools, tips or strategies? Is it samples, ideas, stories or market intelligence? Does it add value to them, their life, their business, their team, their community or the planet? Come up with the tangible and deliverable answers to these questions and watch your sales grow effortlessly.
• The Added Value Strategy.This strategy is similar to the go giving strategy, in that it also asks an important question: “What more can we add to our product or service which will increase its perceived value in the customer’s eyes?” So we can add product training or proper instructions for use or hands on support or extra guarantees or additional useful features at no charge or anything else extra which will add value to our offering. Again, this strategy requires some very creative thinking to devise, but once implemented it delivers astounding results. Take Hyundai for example. They shifted from being perceived as a tiny upstart in the industry to becoming the fourth largest automotive company on the planet. And look at how quickly it happened for them!
• The Customer Centric Strategy. Do you really deliver true customer service? Or just Lip Service? Do you engage and interact with your customers on a regular basis, using their honest feedback to influence your strategy? Is every department in your business customer facing and trained to implement the above strategies with measurable consistency? Everyone in your organisation can add value to the sales process. Technicians, Credit Controllers, Receptionists and IT personnel can all be trained to spot and create sales opportunities. Most importantly, are your sales people able to draw upon specialists from all of your departments and deploy them to assist in customer engagement? If you strategically engage more aspects of your organisation with more aspects of your customer’s, you are instantly able to add tremendous value and simultaneously deepen the relationship for ongoing mutual benefit.

5. And Finally – Increase your Professional Selling Skills. Most of the recognised professions such as medicine, engineering, law, and accounting are required by their associations to engage in Continuous Professional Development (CPD) in order to maintain their accreditation, membership or right to practice. If we are really serious about succeeding at the profession of selling, the onus is on us to find creative ways to engage in your own continuous professional development. This can take many forms, including: Attending conferences or training workshops, talks or lectures, webinars, magazine subscriptions, reading books, listening to audio teachings, subscribing to newsletters, blogs or sales websites. Remember: Knowledge is power and power is knowledge applied.

If you are exhausted from fighting the price war, make some time to plan a significant strategic shift for 2012.

The battle is yours to win.

Yours in Strategic Selling

Mark Berger

The diagram below illustrates the way it appears to me now:

The Sleepwalkers pretty much live lives of quiet desperation. Their lives are a struggle, from paycheck to paycheck, week to week, month to month. Their relationships are toxic. Their health stinks. They are emotional wrecks. For fun, they drink themselves stupid or gamble obsessively or take mind numbing drugs to ease the pain. Some of them make loads of money yet cannot understand why they still feel so empty and sad. Many sleepwalkers are controlled by the media and the governments and society at large. They live to please others and lie with impunity to cover their vulnerability. They believe that “someday their ship will come in” or they will “win the lotto” or be “swept off by a knight in shining armour” and everything will change. They don’t listen to advice because they know it all. They read tabloids and newspapers and works of fiction, because their own lives are so dull and boring. They hate their jobs, their boss, their life. They are overworked and underpaid, stressed and fatigued, sick and tired. In the course of my work I meet hundreds of sleepwalkers every month and my heart bleeds for them. I know exactly how they feel because I have been there myself!

The Seekers have grown tired of sleepwalking and realised that there is so much more to life. More to learn, more to know, more to grow. They have stepped out of their rut and begun to ask questions. Deep questions, uncomfortable questions, questions which shake them to their very core. They have resolved to open their hearts and minds to new learning, new beliefs, new ways of looking at life. They begin to read self help books and attend personal development workshops and lectures. They may even listen to positive and motivational materials in their vehicles as they drive. Their circle of friends begins to change as they move away from toxic negativity and towards uplifting positivity. Their energy levels increase with each new insight, each new understanding, each step towards awakening. They seek the assistance of awakened ones, lightworkers and masters to assist them in their upward journey. Life begins to feel much more interesting, alive and mysterious again. The journey speeds up incrementally as the seekers move relentlessly towards their Awakening.

The Awakened Ones have had one or more cathartic, transformational, life changing experience. All the theory gained during seeking now becomes internalised
as an experienced reality. A sense of joy and peace wells up inside them. They regain the child-like innocence and playfulness of their youth. They follow their instincts, intuitions and gut feelings when making decisions. They walk away from jobs, relationships and habits which no longer serve them. They discover their life’s purpose and begin to manifest their desires at will. Their inner happiness and peace is so profound that it pours out of them and flows into others. They are extremely humble and grateful. Life is a blessing and they accept that every event has its purpose, regardless of how shocking it may seem to others. The awakened ones do all they can to awaken sleepwalkers, not because they feel superior to them, but because they want others to share the unavoidable bliss, joy and peace that comes with the awakening.

The Lightworkers (also known as “alternative healers”) are able to rapidly accelerate our evolution through the levels. They are blessed with gifts we cannot begin to fathom. They see things we can only dream about. They understand the inexplicable. They make sense of the seemingly senseless. They see auras and chakras and spirits and energy fields and past lives. They comprehend numerology and astrology. They see other dimensions and beings and ascended masters. They even delve into physiology and biology. Right now we are blessed with an abundance of lightworkers, in many shapes and forms, who have come to guide us into the next level of human development. They understand that 2012 is not the end of the world or Armageddon, but merely a vital and necessary shift in human consciousness. They know that in order to “save the world” they have to help as many Sleepwalkers and Seekers as possible to evolve and Awaken.

The Masters are the light. They have attained the highest level possible whilst still in human form. They have reached a level of development so refined that they have the ability to influence millions. Their energy is channelled directly from source, giving them tremendous power to uplift and inspire. The masters have always spread the same universal message of love, connectedness, consciousness, compassion, gratitude, acceptance, awareness and meditation or prayer. They have never been interested in glory but have focussed on glorifying others. They have been innocent and humble and radiant, being clear channels for the power of universal energy which allowed them to perform “miracles.” Yet always they have told anyone who really cared to listen: “This power is your power too. Within YOU is the potential to become the light. This is your destiny and your destination. This is the most important and meaningful journey of your whole life.”

This Model is a work in progress. There is much more detail to be found within each level, but that is for another time. For now, please understand that this is not a competitive or aspirational model. It is simply a means to create Self Awareness and self awareness is always the beginning of Personal Evolution. Personal Evolution is the most important work we can do to prepare for 2012. Each of us will be masters in some aspects of our lives and sleepwalkers in others. In fact all of these levels exist within us simultaneously and will shift between different levels at various stages during our life journey. Understand each level and you will understand yourself. In truth, the most important barometer is simply this: Are you GENUINELY HAPPY? Do you feel joyful, grateful, purposeful and connected within yourself? Is your life really working? If your honest answer is yes, then you are at absolutely the right level for you at this time. Your journey is unfolding precisely as it should. If your answer is no, you now have the awareness of why. If you really want to make SHIFT HAPPEN, start by opening your mind and your heart. Trust your instincts like never before. Begin to ask the really important questions. Face your Fears. Transform your life. Seek out fellow seekers, awakened ones, lightworkers and masters to assist you. Invest in a book, workshop, lecture or program. Love yourself enough to do whatever it takes. Know the truth and the truth shall set you free.

As always, I wish you joy on this vital journey. I wish you a safe passage. Most importantly, I wish you lasting inner peace and happiness. It is yours for the taking and you most certainly deserve it.

And anyone who tells you otherwise is probably a sleepwalker!

Mark Berger

I believe that the Western (read: American) version of success is all messed up, outdated and tired, in serious need of a revamp. It’s all about fame and fortune and power and money, no matter what the personal cost. It’s about striving towards some future goal in the hope of someday finding inner peace and happiness. It’s about comparisons to others and keeping up with the Joneses and showing the world how well we are doing. All too often success has a price and the price is our well being.

As part of my research, I googled the word Success.

Dictionary.com defines success as:

1.      The attainment of wealth, position, honours, or the like.

2.      The favourable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavours.

Merriam Webster Online described it as:

1.      The favourable or desired outcome.

2.      The attainment of wealth, favour, or eminence.

Note the future dated words: Attainment, Termination & Outcome.

And whilst success is described as a noun, it seems to be very much about doing things (verbs) in order to have stuff (nouns). But what is it that we really want to have and why? Answer these questions honestly and your life will instantly become more successful.

What do we really want? I have asked this question to thousands of members of my audiences over the years. The answers usually include important things like money, possessions, security, love, respect, recognition, health, wealth and happiness. Yet when I invite them to dig deeper, most people share that they are really looking for PEACE OF MIND or CONTENTMENT or SELF ACCEPTANCE.

The problem with the current success formula is that it says we need to DO a lot of things in order to HAVE more stuff so that we can BE successful. And we keep postponing our success to some future date. We often play the WHEN / THEN game. WHEN I win the lotto, get the promotion or pay off my mortgage; THEN I will be happy. We also feel that we NEED more things in order to feel successful. I need a better job, house, body, partner, or a nicer car, suburb, suit or status symbol. And it all seems like such HARD WORK and so difficult to achieve. Well here is the good news: Success can only be experienced now, in this moment, in this second, and success can only happen INSIDE OF YOU!

The diagram below will illustrate my point:

In the diagram, the horizontal line represents our life from birth through retirement to death. It shows that every day we grow older as we continue on our (external) journey of doing which leads to having. So we work to have money and we study to get a degree. And we are able to learn important skills to assist us in being more effective on this journey, physical skills like machinery operation and software usage and communication skills and time management. On this journey we have no choice regarding the fact that we will get a day older every 24 hours.

The vertical line represents the inner journey we travel in parallel with the outer. This is the journey of knowing and growing ourself, the (internal) journey of being. This is where we learn self acceptance and trust and forgiveness and awareness. This is where we learn to drop our conditioned beliefs and acknowledge our true self. This is where we connect with spirit and thereby become inspired. And we are able to learn important skills to assist us in being more effective on this journey, “soft skills” like self management and meditation and prayer and self awareness and consciousness. On this journey we have infinite choice. This is because everybody grows old but not everybody grows up.

Our western society is obsessed with the external journey. It believes that relentless working on the horizontal plane will automatically lead to growth in the vertical. This formula is fatally flawed. Just look at “famous” names like Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Bernie Madoff, or even Princess Diana. These people “had it all” – fame, fortune, power and respect. Some of them even left a fabulous legacy. Yet it would appear that their inner journey was incomplete. Something vital was missing inside. The inner peace that should have accompanied the outer success did not happen for them.

I believe that we are out of balance. We have become so obsessed with being the best and winning and competing that we have too little time left to look within. We spend so much time on the horizontal journey that we have no time or energy left for the vertical. We are so busy striving towards our future goals (or just bloody surviving) that we lose ourselves in the mix. The symptoms are stress and burnout and fatigue and road rage. The results are dis-ease, divorce and depression. The coping mechanisms are alcohol and cigarettes and caffeine and drugs (both legal and illegal). The consequences are a dysfunctional society and a whole lot of unhappy people.

So what to do?

I am often approached after a presentation or workshop and asked where do I find the time to read and attend workshops and continually grow myself. I sometimes get the comment that because I am in the business of personal growth I have no choice but to continually improve. My response is that we ARE ALL in the business of personal growth, all involved in the horizontal as well as the vertical journey and all looking for the same thing. And that thing we are looking for is INSIDE of us. It can only be found by looking in there with as much dedication and discipline as we pursue a college degree, our first million or our dream home. My personal search has led me to discover powerful eastern wisdom and practises to help me find the balance inside, because the east has always put far more emphasis on the internal journey than the western cultures have up until now.

So here is my formula for Success, described for balance in terms of Health, Wealth and Happiness.

1.      Health has 4 components – Physical, Mental, Emotional and Spiritual.

• Physical – Eat for energy, not weight. Read the labels. Try to eat more live, raw food and less processed, dead food. Eat consciously, slowly and with reverence. Get sufficient exercise and adequate rest.
• Mental – Watch less news reports and more sunsets. Read or listen to self help literature. Learn to really manage your mind or it will continue to manage you. Find effective ways to “switch off” from the incessant mental chatter of your mind.
• Emotional – Develop your emotional intelligence. Learn to express your emotions in a balanced way, as repression is dangerous. But also do not become overwhelmed by your emotions. Learn how to use the tremendous power of your emotions to help you achieve a meaningful, successful life.
• Spiritual – If you are a religious person, use your religion to connect with the highest part of you. Give prayers of gratitude and thanks. If you are not religious, find ways to connect with your spirit, such as meditation, music, nature and being of service. Or use both in combination. Either way, choose to live a more inspired, spiritually connected life.

2.      Wealth is what is left over after the money is all gone. The wealthiest people on the planet do not have lots of money. What they have is lots of assets which are worth lots of money. Whilst saving is good and necessary, you cannot really save your way to wealth. You create wealth by investing in business or property or shares or other valuable assets. Or you develop intellectual property, which has intrinsic value built in. Wealth is also created through changing your belief systems about money.  We need to develop a healthy respect for money and understand the rules of the money game, without becoming obsessed by it.  Read books on wealth creation and also autobiographies of wealthy people you look up to and respect.

3.      Happiness is an inside job. It is the vertical journey. It is not really dependent upon what you have or what you do. It really depends on how you FEEL about what you have and do. I would rather have a little and appreciate it a lot, than the other way around. Happiness comes from self worth and self acceptance, from living up to your own ideals and not the (perceived or real) expectations of others. Happiness comes from the realisation and release of your conditioned negative beliefs and behaviours. You were born happy, until life shut you down. So don’t try to put happiness into yourself – it is always alive in there. Rather discover and remove the beliefs, blockages and fears that are suppressing your true self from expressing right now.

My definition of success is: The ability to live a Balanced Life filled with Health, Wealth and Happiness NOW, whilst working steadily towards Achieving your Goals.

The truth is: You are already successful right now. You have faced the tough obstacles life has thrown at you and you are still here. You have grown as a person, in spite of adversity. If you are fortunate enough to have some basics, like access to the internet, a cellphone, a roof over your head, a refrigerator (with some food in it) and perhaps even a job and an automobile, then you are better off than 9 out of 10 people alive on earth today. To quote author Timothy Ferriss, from his bestseller The 4 Hour Work Week: “People don’t want to be millionaires – they want to experience what they believe only money can buy. $1 000 000 in the bank isn’t the fantasy. The fantasy is the lifestyle of complete freedom it supposedly allows.”

You live in a world which gives you amazing choices for both journeys – horizontal and vertical. I repeat – the west is obsessed with the horizontal. Nothing wrong with that – keep on improving your “hard” skills and make loads of money if that is your goal. However I strongly suggest that you create balance by finding new and innovative ways to improve your “soft” skills. Dive deeply into your vertical journey and you will find a depth of joy you never dreamed possible. Your complete peace of mind, self acceptance and contentment are only a heartbeat away.

Stop postponing your Success – Choose to live it NOW!

Yet, at some level, something told us it was going to be an awesome, exciting and extraordinary event. Somehow we knew that we would pull it off, albeit in our uniquely schizophrenic SA fashion. And boy did we get it right! The tournament was an unadulterated success, a whirlwind of matches, fan-walks, fan-parks and fanfares. Even our traditionally negative media got on board and blew the vuvuzela with mostly positive reporting. Crime decreased and when it occurred it was dealt with decisively. It was dubbed by FIFA as the most successful world cup ever!

After the final whistle, the business gears began to move again. Indecision was replaced by positive action and we moved into a more prosperous period. We rode a wave of certainty, fuelled with the pride of achievement and hope for the future. We had finally come to believe in ourselves.

But now the tide has turned again. The SA rollercoaster is moving uphill once more.   The media has turned mostly negative. The schizophrenic pendulum has swung to the other side.

So all this has really got me thinking about schizophrenic SA. I am pondering some difficult questions right now. Like how is it that we can be known as one of the most friendly, warm, hospitable people on earth AND also have one of the highest rates of murder, crime, rape and violence? How can we feel so much pride a few months ago and so quickly slip back into self loathing when a tourist is senselessly murdered in Gugulethu? How can we open our arms to the world yet close our hearts to the suffering of our fellow countrymen? How can we produce a magician like Mandela and a monster like Malema?  Why is it that when something is sent in a car, it’s called shipment, and yet when something is sent in a ship, it’s called cargo? What the heck is a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free? And why can I never stay serious for too long without slipping into sarcasm or dark humour?

I do not have the absolute answers to any of these. However, as a patriotic South African, I will attempt to answer in the only way which makes sense to me. If these answers seem senseless to you, go read the newspapers and get depressed instead. This is a motivational newsletter remember!

We are attempting to heal our violent society. The 25^th November saw the commencement of the annual 16 days of Activism for No Violence against Women and Children. In addition, The Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation has done a lot of excellent work since 2007 in attempting to determine the reasons for the endemic violence in schizophrenic SA. In an April 2009 supplementary report, submitted to the minister of safety and security, the centre mentioned contributing factors to violence such as:

1. The legacy of apartheid and colonialism.
2. Brutalisation and the culture of violence.
3. Racism
4. Firearms
5. Impunity in township areas.
6. Inequality and poverty.
7. State Institutions such as the courts and education system.

This report was well researched and presented, but because it was focused on violent crime and not violence in general, it missed a few vital components. For example it did not mention the effects on thousands of South African Soldiers of being forced to fight an immoral war, on our borders, in the townships and in our neighbouring countries. I believe that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is rife in ex SADF soldiers. I know this firsthand, having served 6 of my 24 months compulsory military service on “the border.”

The report also did not mention the ongoing nightmare faced by members of the South African Police Services (SAPS), many of whom regularly have to face crime, death, violence and disrespect. I believe that a large percentage of them must be affected by PTSD. Consider a policeman, who has witnessed gruesome crime scenes, possibly seen friends and colleagues killed violently, discovered decomposing bodies or been abused by members of their communities. The sad thing is that they are regularly offered counseling services by the SAPS, yet most refuse to go because it will be entered on their files and could affect their chances of promotion up the ranks. As a result they walk around like human time bombs, and some eventually commit crimes against others or even end up killing their loved ones and families in gruesome “familycides.”

I also did not see a mention of the PTSD experienced by the thousands of victims of crime and violence, a self perpetuating cycle of reaction on reaction.

And let’s not forget the impact of domestic violence and abuse, perpetrated against “loved ones.”

The reports made a number of suggestions to address the issues. All have merit and could go a long way towards solving the problem. I hope from the bottom of my heart that they will be implemented and achieve the result we all want. We are already seeing improvements, for example the murder rate fell substantially during 2010.

I am no expert in the field of crime and violence. My passion is for inspiration, motivation and, most importantly, TRANSFORMATION. So for what it is worth, I will attempt to put forward some additional suggestions to add to what is already on the table.

We are a desperately under psychologised society. Our egos and conditioning (cowboys don’t cry) cause us to believe that we can deal with emotional issues ourselves. We believe that we do not need assistance or counseling to assist us in dealing with grief, anger, depression, violence, relationship issues, substance abuse and PTSD. The truth and reconciliation commission was a brave and worthy attempt to heal the past. Yet the scars remain, like festering wounds in our collective psyche. We are a society that will visit a doctor or traditional healer without blinking an eye and swallow unquestioningly the potions they prescribe. Yet mention to your average South African the alternative options such as psychology, counseling or spiritual healing and they run a mile! Most men (statistically the main perpetrators of violence) are petrified to go near any of these. So they will drown their sorrows in alcohol and drugs, both legal and illegal, rather than take alternative steps to work through their stuff. Their fears, ego’s and our judgemental society will simply not allow them to open up and become vulnerable, which is an essential prerequisite for healing.

To heal our society, we urgently need to find ways to get these people to seek help. Real help, not temporary band aids which mask the symptoms yet do not address the cause. The people who love them should try every means possible to get them to an alternative healing option as soon as possible. They may not realise it, but the options for real healing are vast.

As mentioned, I am an ex soldier who was brainwashed and conditioned and trained to kill others with a huge variety of scary weapons. Over the last 25 years I have chosen to face my fears and take the steps necessary to heal myself. I have tried most of the options suggested below, believing that somehow in combination they would help me to heal. And they have. My life now overflows with peace, joy and gratitude and I see beauty and miracles all around me, every day.

It is my deepest wish that life could be experienced this way for many more of my fellow South Africans.

Therefore I will briefly list a few of the possible healing options below and you can use google to find more detailed information:

1. Attend any one of the available Transformational Group Trainings available in SA, such as: ALIVE by World Alive, Landmark Forum by Landmark Education, Master 1 by Consciousness Coaching, More to Life Weekend by More to Life, I am forum by Pat Grove, New Warrior Training Adventure by Mankind Project, and Turning Point by Centre of Light. These are just some of the powerful options out there which can offer significant growth, healing and lasting transformation.
2. Qualified Counselors: Just ask around and you will find them everywhere.
3. Social Workers can also be helpful in many instances.
4. Psychologists: For some a shrink or “kop dokter” could provide the solution.
5. Spiritual Healers and Sangomas are growing in popularity.
6. Homeopaths, Acupuncturists, Reiki Therapists and Kinesiologists.
7. Yoga, Tai Chi and Meditation Practitioners.
8. Other Alternative Healers.

There is literally a veritable buffet of options available. The immediate results I have seen achieved by these practitioners are astounding. Who you choose will depend upon the personality of the person requiring the help. The dichotomy is that the very deep issues which require the healing will keep many from seeking any help at all. The deep fears underlying their violence will actually sabotage their chances for redemption.

Unless those closest to them have the courage to lead them across the bridge. Before they fall off. Before the time bomb explodes.

This is our schizophrenic society. So full of hope and possibility, yet painfully hamstrung by our past. So capable of love, compassion and Ubuntu, yet wrestling our individual and collective demons. Desperately wanting lasting inner peace, yet not knowing how to take the proper steps to heal the turmoil within.

The biggest problem in our country is not violence and violent crime. That is the symptom of the problem. The main problem is the denial of the need for healing by thousands of sufferers of PTSD and their resistance to seek help. Their “tough guy” conditioning prevents them from becoming vulnerable and surrendering to expert healing.

The good news is that HELP IS ALL AROUND! I have a growing network of incredible healing practitioners and am more than happy to refer the brave few who are willing to ask me. All you need to do is drop me an email.

I deeply love this country and all of her people. I believe that we will overcome these challenges, because we have the collective will and capability to do so. I am passionately committed to doing whatever it takes to help us become as magnificent as we are destined to be. And I am privileged to see the miraculous transformation of individuals who take the leap of faith.

So as we prepare to bid farewell to 2010 and prepare for the festive season, I wish you healing and peace and joy and celebration with your loved ones.

For 2011, I wish you everything that you wish for.

Remember, happiness is an inside job.

Do whatever it takes to find it. Do it now.

Heal yourself and you will help to heal our nation.

With Love

Mark

I have seen this coming for a while now. Since 2008 I have written numerous newsletters criticising the media for their negativity and unbalanced reporting.

Of course, nobody in the media took much notice. Now the mango has really klapped the fan and we are sitting at another critical point in the history of our young democracy.

Before I begin, I want to state the following upfront:

1. I stand unequivocally and absolutely for complete media freedom in our country. The draconian, restrictive clauses in the Protection of Information Bill and the proposed Media Appeals Tribunal are a major threat to our democracy. They should be fought tooth and nail by everybody (including you) at every opportunity. 
   
2. I also stand unequivocally and absolutely for BALANCED reporting. I would like to be fed a balanced diet consisting of what is going wrong in our country (and the world) and what is going right. This is definitely not happening right now!
3. When I speak of the media in this article, I speak mainly of the print press, radio and television news reports. I refer broadly to the world media at large, not just the South African Media.
4. I also stand for balanced politics. I am therefore not aligned or loyal to any political party. I am loyal to my country and her citizens. I will therefore always vote for the opposition, regardless of which party it happens to be, until such time as we have a healthy balance of political power in SA. In the USA, they have only 2 parties, both with almost equal support. The one is more left wing and the other more right wing. This creates a healthy balance of power, and every few years the one ruling party is replaced by the other and the new broom has the opportunity to sweep clean. I long for the day when we can get to a similar position in our country.
5. I do not subscribe to GLOP, or General Labelling Of People. I therefore do not believe that ALL politicians and ALL policemen are corrupt. I do not believe that ALL journalists and ALL editors have hidden agendas. I do not believe that ALL men are pigs and ALL blondes are dumb. My experience has shown me that ALL people are unique and different, with a capacity for good and evil in equal measure. The Yin and the Yan exists in ALL of us. It is the CHOICES we make in each moment of each day which will determine who we become.
6. I am a serial optimist, in that I always look for the inherent good in people, situations and life. I acknowledge that there is a whole lot in the news right now which may make some people concerned, angry, ashamed or downright terrified. I simply do not allow this drama to affect my positive focus or drain my valuable energy. I choose rather to be part of the solution and therefore keep looking for ways to make things better for myself and my fellow South Africans. Life is what you make it my boet, and happiness is an inside job!
7. I am privileged to meet hundreds of new people every month as part of my work. They are people of every age, sex, race and religion. I interact and motivate and communicate and connect with them at all levels. I find most of them to be kind, helpful, concerned, caring people who simply want a better life for themselves and their loved ones. Yet they find it increasingly difficult to stay positive about our country (or the planet) and its future. Their attitude is massively influenced by what they see, hear and read in the mainstream media.
8. I have a tendency to look at the bigger picture of our country, planet, galaxy and universe as a way to stay positive by keeping it all in perspective. I also try to be open-minded and see things from many different viewpoints, in order to understand WHY things are the way they are.

Ok so lets get into the topic of media freeDOM. In my understanding, the word NEWS is an acronym for North, East, West and South. Therefore part of the job of the media is to tell us what is going ON. Yet they insist upon telling us mainly what is going WRONG. More than 75% of what we see, hear and read in the mainstream media is negative.This would appear to be a worldwide phenomenon, as evidenced by the following quotes:

Bestselling American author Deepak Chopra: “The current perception I get from the news is that the world is dominated by human failure, crime, catastrophe, corruption, and tragedy. We are all tuning in to see how the human mind is evolving, but the media keeps hammering home the opposite, that the human mind is mired in darkness and folly”.

Paul Conneally, Head of Media for the International Red Cross: “In 2008, more than 75 percent of the media stories in Africa were negative. This is despite the fact that there are many positive indications that the African economy is going from strength to strength, that governments are becoming more accountable.”

A verse from John Mayer’s hit song, Waiting for the world to change: “When you trust the television, what you get is what you got, cause when they own the information, they can bend it all they want.”

In my May 2008 newsletter I sunk so low as to refer to journalists as uninspired, negative, disaster focused, sensation seeking, sad sorry scumbags. Again, I have come to realise that not ALL of them deserve this nasty title. However, since then, I have repeatedly asked why they insist on shoving so much D down our throats – Death, Destruction, Disaster, Divorce, Disease, Doubt, Depression and Doom.  I have literally pleaded for them to dish us up more palatable, balanced fare with lots more C – Compassion, Caring, Courage, Consciousness, Creativity, Community, Comedy, Chivalry and Capability.

Yet all we ever seem to see is Catastrophe after Catastrophe.

Have you ever considered the reasons why the media cannot give us more C? Here are some possible causes:

1. They are simply giving the public what they want. They understand that for some strange reason we are morbidly attracted to the horror and disaster and drama. I often ask my audiences why they continue to watch, read or listen to the news, when about 80% of it is negative. They usually tell me: “I need to know what is going on”, or “I have always watched it – it’s just a habit” or “it makes me feel good to know that the crap I see going on out there is not happening to me!” Well break the habit buddy – you may as well go and bang your head against a wall because it feels so good when the pain stops.

2. The media have their backs against the wall – they are under major threat and engaged in a desperate fight for survival. They face huge competition from each other, as well as from the Internet, YouTube, Blogs, Social Media, Gumtree and the likes. Advertising revenue is plunging and shareholders are complaining. So they are forced to find the most sensationalist, scary, shocking headlines and stories in order to try and sell more newspapers and advertising space. When it comes to choosing headlines: If it bleeds – it leads. Sies man!

3. It is damn difficult to write positive, uplifting, funny, motivational articles. Do you know that it literally takes me weeks to write these newsletters? It involves countless hours of preparation and researching and agonising and refining and adding and deleting and fretting and fussing. I’m serious – writing these things sometimes feels like giving birth to a porcupine – a true labour of love.

It just seems to be so much easier to dig up some muck, uncover an affair, gasp at the levels of greed and corruption or dish up another disaster. According to the World Health Organisation, 150 000 people will die on this planet EVERY 24 HOURS and some of these deaths are bound to be horrific. So how hard do you really have to look to find something tragic to report on?

By the way, I am all for investigative reporting – goodness knows we really do need these brave people. But what about the POSITIVE investigative reporting – who does that? Who is tasked to go and sniff out the diligent, hard working unsung heroes in our politics, police force, educational system, bureaucracies and municipalities ? Who writes about those passionate, committed human beings who fulfil the thankless role of being true public servants? Somebody out there is providing low cost homes, electrifying the townships, supplying clean running water, improving our roads, catching criminals and paying out welfare. A whole lot of people worked their butts off to make the Soccer World Cup such a major success. Yet how many stories have you read about them in the media?

Think about this – how would you feel if you were a quiet, diligent, hardworking, honest, uncorrupt public servant, going the extra mile for your constituents and earning a pretty small salary to boot. You never seek the limelight because you are not doing this for the glory – it is your patriotic call of duty. And all you ever get to read about is the scum and sleaze and the sickening greed and excess of your colleagues.

How would this make you feel? Proud perhaps, or patriotic and motivated to work harder? Shit scared that you might get caught if you behave the way they do? Or tempted to get on the gravy train yourself because nobody seems to get convicted if they are caught anyway?

Option 3 seems most likely to me!

Do you stubborn editors sincerely believe that fear is a deterrent any more? Get your arrogant heads out of your arses and wake up! Fear ceased to work years ago. We have moved into a new age, a time of awakening consciousness, a time for using positive praise to reinforce good behaviour. You have not moved with the times. Admittedly, you have become really good at catching people who screw up. Now however, it is time for you to also start catching them succeeding.

The media seem to believe that if they continually catch people doing things WRONG, eventually EVIL will be eradicated and GOOD will prevail. So they encourage whistle blowing and investigative reporting and exposés. This is all good and well, but is it achieving the result? No, because the theory is fatally flawed. We all know psychologically that telling somebody NOT to do something is like waving a red flag to a bull.

So they keep perpetuating the negative behaviour. They turn criminals into superstars. Why can’t they turn boring bureaucrats or brave policemen into heroes? Or is that too much like hard work and not really “newsworthy” either?

The media seriously needs to redefine this term “newsworthy” if they want to retain their worth and relevance. Because even if government succeeds in forcing through restrictive legislation, modern technology will ensure that there is always a free flow of relevant information. And for this to happen we don’t really NEED the mainstream media. This is the awesome power of the internet!

Right now I can imagine the editors and journalists thinking: “Piss off you privileged little prick – it’s easy for you to sit in your ivory tower and take pot shots at us. You have no idea of the challenges we face every day in doing our jobs.”

You are right. I have never worked within the media. And I can imagine that you work under extreme deadlines and huge pressure, sometimes for relatively little pay. And right now, your very survival is being challenged. I imagine that it must be an extremely challenging time for all of you. That is why I say it is time to adapt or die my friends.

In my line of work, I speak to hundreds of people each month, literally thousands per year, with the objective of motivating and inspiring them and giving them hope and self belief. And I have realised that they believe what you feed them and that your narrative shapes their attitudes dramatically. And they have become so numbed and shell shocked that they have lost their passion, their hope, their optimism and compassion. They are wandering in the terrifying wilderness looking for guidance and you are giving them very little, if any, scraps of hope. Yet you expect them to support you now, in your time of need?

The question is simply as follows: Do you believe that seeing is believing or BELIEVING IS SEEING? Think about that deeply. Are you merely reporting on what is happening or are you actually CAUSING some of it to happen? Have you ever considered that some of your reporting on criminal behavoiur might actually encourage others to commit crimes?

Alternatively, do you understand the power of an optimistic nation filled with belief in itself?

Yet you continue to report mainly on what is going wrong, assuming that the public will find out for themselves what is really going on, what is going right. Well too many of them do not, they cannot, they will not. They need you to tell them, because they trust you and they believe you and they pay your salaries. You wield great power, and with great power comes great responsibility. I believe that it is the irresponsible use of this power which is partly to blame for the current media freedom debacle.

As I said earlier, I am all for media freedom. I am all for democracy and choice. But if you cannot make the shift to balanced, responsible reporting, you will cease to exist my friends. You are busy digging your own graves.

The negative news depresses me. It always has. It creates the perception that there is more going wrong on the planet than is going right. It fans the flames of fear in our hearts. And yet, there is so much good happening, in many of our communities, our workplaces, our corporations, our NGO’s, our places of worship, our conservation activities, our charities and our informal business sector.

I think that half of the hoo-ha going on right now actually boils down to the fact that the media rarely highlights any of the good work being done by our ruling party. They rarely champion any of the positive achievements of the ANC. They paint them (as they did the Nats before them) as corrupt, incompetent, bumbling buffoons, driven by greed and ego and nepotism. And as I said before, not ALL of them are like that. If they were, our country would be a lot worse off than it is right now. Perhaps it’s because the media are afraid of being seen as too patriotic or selling out to the government if they did show some balance by also reporting on their positive achievements?

Well I am not afraid. As I said earlier, I will support the opposition until we have a balance of power. But this does not mean that I cannot acknowledge the great work done by Trevor Manuel, Gill Marcus, Pravin Gordhan, Tito Mboweni, Cheryl Carolus, Tokyo Sexwale and Cyril Ramaphosa. And these are the high profile people. How many more are there to be found out there, doing good, selfless, honest work to help make this place better? Let’s find them and praise them and report on them so that they can become highly visible, high profile shining examples of what is going right.

In the profession of selling we sometimes split our sales team into hunters and farmers. Hunters are tasked with seeking out new business and prospects whilst farmers focus on building and nurturing the existing relationships. What if the media employed a similar approach – hunters were tasked to dig up and expose the negative issues and farmers were instructed to focus on sniffing out and reporting on the good stuff. Cause we all know there is a whole lot of really good stuff going on out there. But how will the “farmers” make the “ordinary stuff” NEWSWORTHY? And, more importantly, will it be bought by their customers? It takes hard work, effort, sweat and creativity to find the good stuff being done by Joe Public and more importantly – to write about it in a positive, uplifting and interesting way.

But there are glimmers of hope. Just google Lead SA or SA Goodnews or Awesome SA or Stop Crime Say Hello. Take a look at how much good news they have to offer. Then ask yourself why you still pay to get depressed when there is so much positive stuff available for free?

The media must take some responsibility for the current media freedom debacle. I am not asking you to stop exposing the negatives. I am imploring you to find ways to balance these with more positives. We are hungry for good news boet, in fact we are starving .

Ultimately, it will require of us, the public, to shift beyond OUR conditioned, negative, fearful, victim based beliefs before we are ready to support such a massive shift in the mainstream media.

We urgently need to wake ourselves up, to become more conscious, to dramatically increase our awareness. We need to start recycling our garbage and conserving resources and saving our planet. We need to stop fearing and hating each other. We need to finally learn to love and accept ourselves and others. The next 2 years are going to force us to do this. We are going to see more change and uncertainty in the next 2 years than we saw in the last 10. And our best method to cope with this challenge will be to dramatically accelerate our spiritual evolotion. We do this through growing our knowledge and experience of what it means to be a conscious, whole and humble human being.

To quote Gary Zukav, from his beautiful book The Seat of the Soul: “Our species is no longer humble. It has no reverence. It is arrogant and filled with its own technology. We take from the earth and from each other. We destroy forests and oceans and atmosphere. We enslave each other, and torture and beat and humiliate and murder each other.”

He goes on to suggest: “Your decision to evolve consciously through responsible choice contributes not only to your own evolution, but also to the evolution of all of those aspects of humanity in which you participate. It is not just you that is evolving through your decisions, but the entirety of humanity.

So there you have it. And now that you know it is ultimately all up to you, yes YOU, what on earth can you do?

It’s your time now to stand up and be counted. Join Lead SA. Write letters to your media of choice, encouraging them to balance their reporting. Sign all the petitions for media freedom. Read self help books and attend workshops to accelerate your evolution. Find a spiritual teacher or healer. Get a LIFE.

If you are unsure where to start with all of this, please email me and I will gladly point you to the multitude of books, courses, teachers and resources which are readily available to you right now. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

But, most importantly, do whatever it takes to drop your baggage, move from victim to victor and make the shift from pessimist to optimist. Start making a difference wherever you can RIGHT NOW instead of waiting for the world to change. Start by really knowing and growing yourself. Start by becoming a better you.

As Gandhi said: “Be the change you want to see in the world.”

You are the world. It is your time to shine. Do it NOW.

Ke Nako

Mark

On Saturday I witnessed an historic event – two South African Rugby teams playing in a Super 14 final at the Orlando Stadium in Soweto. It was amazing to see the stadium full of cheering Rugby Fans, the cacophony of droning Vuvuzelas, the colourful Makarapas and president Zuma pitching up on the pitch to greet the players before kick-off. For an optimist like me, this was a significant event, one which brought back powerful emotional memories of Rugby World Cup 1995. (Although back then my team won the game…)

Of course the pessimists will say it was a non event, a sham, nothing more than a short lived publicity stunt for political gain. The realists will say it was only a rugby game; South Africa has much more pressing (and depressing) issues to overcome.

Henry Ford once said: If you think you can or you think you can’t – you are right. I think the same applies to belief in the future success of our country – if you think we can or you think we can’t – you are right! It depends upon whether you are a pessimist, optimist or realist.

Right now, the pessimists are having a field day regarding South Africa. Like Karoo sheep they will bleat about Crime, Corruption, Malema, Zuma, The Erosion of Land Rights, Senseless Farm Murders, the Crumbling Justice System, Poor Service Delivery, Nationalisation of Mines, Unemployment and Cadre Deployment et al.

And they are absolutely RIGHT! Every one of these issues is evidence of their being right. We face massive challenges, challenges which the pessimists believe we as a nation will not be able to overcome. They insist that our country, like the optimist who fell off the building, is falling rapidly towards a major disaster. In their opinion it’s only a matter of time before the mango really hits the fan. They repeatedly tell the optimists to get out of denial and start facing the grim reality of what in their opinion is the inevitable decline of another African economy. Just look at the evidence from up north they say, from Mad Bob to Gaddafi and in between, to see where we are going to end up.

The optimists, on the other hand, have to range far and wide (just like Karoo sheep) to find meagre pickings of hope. After some reflection they might mention our Rapidly Improving Infrastructure, Major Intersections Being Rebuilt, Awesome New Airports, The Gautrain, Bus Rapid Transit System, Tax Collection Efficiency, Our Stable Currency, Declining Inflation, Solid Banking System and Our Free Press. Not to mention that we are about to host the biggest sporting event in the world right now. They will ask if you have noticed the side mirror socks and SA flags on so many cars, showing a growing groundswell of support for Bafana Bafana to play their hearts out and make ALL OF US proud.

The optimists may also remind you to take a good look at the overall state of our economy today, compared to 1994, as evidence of how far we have come as a nation.
And THEY too, are absolutely RIGHT. Every one of these points is a real reason to believe, a reason to feel positive that we as a nation can survive, thrive and succeed. Each one of these are real achievements, concrete evidence that we can get things done and make significant progress, despite our many challenges.

And what of the realists? They will most likely take another perspective, a look at the bigger picture and ask 3 vital questions:

1. How is S.A. REALLY doing?
2. How is the REST OF THE WORLD doing in comparison?
3. What sort of shape is our whole PLANET in right now?

Some answers they may give us would be:

1. How are we really doing? Realistically, we are doing OK, with lots to be proud of and lots to be concerned about, in equal measure. It really comes down to a question of what you choose to focus on. More importantly, it comes down to what each of us is actually doing to make things better. Worrying achieves nothing; it simply creates stress, fear and negativity. Waiting for a political solution is a waste of valuable time. Taking action to make a difference breeds real change, positivity and optimism.
2. How is the rest of the world doing? Thailand just had 88 deaths due to Political infighting in Bangkok. Europe is facing a major Euro currency crisis. Greece and Spain (and probably more to come) are in deep financial trouble. So deep that France is threatening to pull out of the Eurozone. Britain has lost faith in their politicians. Every sixth child in Germany is on welfare. Volcanic ash is causing regular mayhem over parts of Europe. A friend recently returned from a 2 week driving holiday in Italy. He tells me that they have numerous, massive potholes which make ours seem tiny by comparison. The USA is facing its biggest oil spill disaster ever. They also found a large, (malfunctioning) car bomb in Times Square on 1st May. And they still owe around US $ 400 trillion to somebody – the world’s largest budget deficit? Australia faces issues like refugee boats, teen pregnancy and major drug abuse among their youth. A recent survey found that the Aussie population feels that their government is interfering way too much in all aspects of their lives. Sound familiar?
3. What about our planet? Right now, she is struggling with a nett population growth of some 200 000 new humans per day – that’s an extra 1 million every five days. We are literally swarming like ants and the impact is showing. So we are seeing global warming, earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanoes and other planetary disruptions. Some even say that the melting ice caps could affect the delicate weight balance and cause earth to shift on her axis – then we will see some major SHI(F)T happen – in our lifetime!

And as I write all of this, I can hear the pessimists bleating again: SO WHAT Mark, two wrongs don’t make a right, get with the program, who cares about the rest of the world when our country is going to the dogs?

Listen ouens, I am only going to say this once: The world is your oyster and you can choose to go and live anywhere you like. The choices are vast. The truth is that WHEREVER YOU GO, YOU TAKE YOURSELF WITH YOU! You will still wake up every day and have to look in the mirror at your optimistic, pessimistic or realistic face. And if you have reason to complain about SA, you will most likely find as many reasons to complain about your new country, your neighbours, politicians, the weather, rising prices, bureaucracy, traffic, systems, language and food et al. Granted you will probably feel safer and more secure regarding violent crime, but will you feel HAPPY? Happiness comes from within and everywhere you go you will still face challenges. Different challenges maybe, but no less difficult to overcome.

And what of feeling secure? Helen Keller said: “Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”

I am somewhat concerned about the future of our planet. I do not always feel 100% safe in my country right now. But I am 100% happy and confident it will improve. My life has always been a daring adventure. And, most importantly, I am doing something positive to make a difference instead of sitting around waiting for the world to change. Every month, I work with hundreds of my countrymen to improve their attitudes, productivity, optimism, efficiency, profitability, motivation and team work. At the workplace, I see people of all colours, religions and creeds, male and female, old and young, integrating and working together to make things better. I see the shift happening amongst leaders, staff and their customers. On Saturday, in Soweto, I saw that shift begin to happen socially, outside the workplace, in the townships, which is where the real work still needs to be done. I saw the birth of hope.

On selected weekends, I assist groups of brave individuals to take a profound journey deep inside and discover what distorted beliefs are running their lives. I witness “strangers” sharing their true feelings with other “strangers” and thereby becoming friends. I see people dropping their masks and prejudices, being completely authentic with others and thereby undergoing profound transformation, like caterpillars becoming butterflies. I see hope being restored and deep human bonds being formed, regardless of race or age or religious belief. I see the light begin to shine from within, as we strip away the darkness of depression, fear, self loathing and negative conditioning. I see extreme pessimists make a complete pendulum swing through realism to optimism. It is the most rewarding work I have ever done in my life.

All of the above gives me joy and makes my life meaningful. It gives me reason to believe, because I SEE IT HAPPEN. I do not read the newspapers, because they mostly tell me what is going wrong. I remain focused on what is REALLY GOING ON, and find that there is much to be optimistic about. I realise that it is up to each individual to first change themselves and then help others do the same, if we are to have a safer, kinder, more conscious and compassionate world.

Woodrow Wilson said: “You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand.”

Our own Johnny Clegg sang: It’s a CRUEL, CRAZY, BEAUTIFUL world. I believe the world appears to be Cruel to the Pessimists, Crazy to the Realists and Beautiful to the Optimists.

Which one are you?

Well it is now 20 years on, and here we are my boet.

And tonight our president will take a break from impregnating the women of our nation to impregnate us with pride in what we have achieved in 20 years. The king of swing will fill us in on what is happening. Apparently he will speak to us in his capacity as head of state not head of government. Security would be advised to check the podium beforehand in case someone is hiding in there to give him some head. Anyway, let’s move ahead.

In case you are unable to tune in at 7pm, here is a brief summary of the state of the nation:

Dear friends

The nation is in a state. A state of change, a state of confusion, a state of emancipation, a state of anticipation. Our roads are in a hell of a state. Some of the Free State is underwater. Let me state categorically that all of these states are merely pigments of your imagination. Here are the actual facts:

• Vehicle hijackings have decreased. However, the whole country has been hijacked by FIFA for a good part of 2010.
• Crime is down but fear of crime has increased thanks to the negative media and UK company Protektorvest offering knife proof vests to soccer tourists.
• The Garden Route is parched and Gauteng is flooded.
• The recession is still causing a fair amount of depression.
• The stock market stinks. The rand is looking pretty grand.
• The gap between rich and poor has increased, as it has in many other similar countries in the world.
• Cape Town has just been voted one of the top 6 most beautiful cities in the world by Forbes magazine.
• We still have some of the bluest skies in the world.
• The new soccer stadiums are magnificent and reason to be proud
• Cadbury’s chocolate is still way better than any imported Swiss stuff.
• Mrs Balls could be the funniest name for a food company in the world.
• We have not lost our innate ability to laugh at ourselves.

What makes our nation so special is that we live life to the full, every minute, every hour, every day. We suck the marrow from the bones of life and seize the day, (because we never know if we will still be alive tomorrow.) Our lives are rich, complex, challenging and interesting. We speak 11 different languages yet strive to be one nation. Somehow, despite the odds, we manage to unite in crisis and support each other. We also try to help the rest of the world, with organisations such as Gift of the Givers making a major contribution in Haiti.

There is something so special about this country and its people. I cannot articulate what it is because it is ethereal, energetic, emotional and indescribable. But those who live here and those who visit us can sense it, feel it, experience it. It is the combined energy of 358 years of history – turbulent, violent, passionate and pioneering. It is the hopes and dreams born in the dusty townships and corporate boardrooms. It is the tremendous, ground breaking innovations and inventions like Heart Transplants, CAT scan machines, Oil from Coal, 128 bit security encryption, the Kreepy Krauly, Vuvuzela and Vuyo’s Wors. It is our honesty, our creativity, our humility and our tenacity that make me proud to be a citizen of this great nation.

This is the state of the nation. We are not the United States but we stand united.

Now that’s AYOBA!

I recall singing the “old” anthem at school with no passion, going through the motions, feeling no emotion at all. I remember how just a few years ago, many South Africans resisted the new anthem, refusing to accept the modified version. And I realise how far we have come, when the nation unites in indignation at the butchering of the anthem by brother Ras Dumisani in France.

I recall the comments that our new flag was too colourful and busy and looked like a pair of Y-Front underpants. Today I see our flag flown with pride at events such as the FIFA world cup pool draw, watched by hundreds of millions of people worldwide. I see a nation, at once troubled and divided, uniting behind our new symbols reflecting unity, diversity and the desire for a better life.

And as the year draws to a close, I feel the fatigue of a long 12 months. My first reaction is to think it has been an “Annus Horribilus” (Latin for Horrible Year.) But as you know, it is in my nature to seek the positives and see the glass as half full. So I take a deep breath and make time to really reflect upon what has been positive and what I am grateful for. It is at first difficult, my thoughts are blocked. Then suddenly, surprisingly, a stream of positives begins to flow through my mind. Briefly, here are some of them:

On a personal note:

• I am grateful that my business has actually improved through the downturn and emerged leaner as a result, ready to capitalise on the upturn when it comes.
• I am grateful to all my loyal customers, who have continued to support me even though their training budgets have been slashed. Thank you so much!
• I am grateful to our IT Guy, who organised our database, redesigned the website and demystified many of our IT challenges. Thanks Francois.
• I am grateful to my Consciousness Coach, who taught me that if we hold an important question in mind for long enough; we will become the living answer to that question. Thanks Michele.
• I am grateful to the founders of World Alive, for designing the most powerful personal development program available in South Africa and electing me to run the Cape Town Office. Thank you for believing in me.
• I am grateful to my wife and family, who have continued to support me in my journey to make a difference. I love you guys so much.
• I am grateful to my peers and colleagues, who continually challenge and support me to reach greater heights of awareness.
• I am grateful to you who read my newsletters, and give me so much valuable feedback. THANK YOU!
• I am grateful that this year has caused me to deeply evaluate what is really important and where to spend more of my quality time.

On a broader scale:

• I am grateful that humanity is realising how urgently we need to make dramatic changes to save this precious planet. I am confident that humankind has the intelligence and creativity to find ways to do this.
• I am grateful that we still have some honest policemen who risk their lives every day, for very little pay, in order to protect us.
• I am grateful for the teachers, doctors and nurses in public service who believe that making a difference and serving others is more important than money.
• I am grateful that we still have some officials and politicians (yes we do!) who fulfil the role of being public servants without greedily stuffing their pockets. Thank goodness for you!

How about you? Have you taken the time to reflect upon what you can be grateful for? Can you identify the positives from the past year? Or are you stuck in the belief that it was all bad?

The trick is to step outside the box, to go deep within and ask the question: What went right this year? For me, my relationships, my personal growth, my business, the country, the planet. What did I learn, how did I grow? What will I do differently next year as a result?

Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude. It makes you more positive and opens up space for you to receive more. It is better to have a little, and appreciate it a lot, than to have a lot and appreciate it a little (or not at all!)

In closing, I wish you and your loved ones a safe, relaxing and joyful festive season.

Please drive safely – enjoy the Ride! Remember that statistically you are 300 times more likely to die in a motor vehicle accident than as the victim of a violent incident in South Africa.

I don’t know about you but it has become patently obvious to me that I am addicted to my inbox. I reckon that I click on send/receive at least 30 times per day. It is a powerful and absorbing thing, this internet and its related technologies. I was planning to book into a rehab centre till I learned that a Chinese lightie of 15 was recently BEATEN TO DEATH whilst attending an internet addicts boot camp. The Skynews article also notes that China has the world’s largest internet population, with almost 300 million users, and that they have more than 200 organisations offering treatment for web addiction. Only last month, the nation banned electro-shock therapy as a treatment for the problem. How’s that for harsh my China?

Anyway, back to Boerewors Country. Almost everyone I know spends large chunks of their valuable time staring hypnotically into their computer monitor. Or Blackberry, or i Phone, or Omnia or Palm or PDA. Or Playstation, PSP, X Box or Wii. Or the blerrie TV. We cannot escape being sucked into the information vortex. But what are we seeing in front of us, what information is really being delivered here? To be honest it’s mostly irrelevant twak, which does very little to enhance our already stressed lives.

Let’s check out the most common items up for grabs on the techno-buffet:

Email:

I am a very lucky dude. Every day I win millions of Euros in the lotto and can easily buy Fake Rolexes, Top Quality University Degrees, Wonderful Weight Loss Products, Sensual Massages, Penis Enlargers, Viagra and of course Niagra (the female version of Viagra.) Based upon the number of mails I have received in the past 12 months, at least 263 897 people believe my male member is undersized. And this is just in my Junk Mail Folder!

In my inbox, I have 6 507 896 365.33 newsletters, invoices, unread mails, awaiting action tasks, jokes and worst of all, soppy inspirational pieces. In fact, if I see one more “pass this on to your 10 worst enemies and you will be eternally doomed”  email involving flowery words accompanied by lame ducks, cute kids, amiable animals, planets, forests, lakes, mountains or flowers, I am going to throw up all over my keyboard. Sies man.

Internet:

I really love Google. They have allowed me to access the world’s largest library with fast, intelligent searching. Internet Banking allows me to manipulate my meagre money matters to my heart’s content. Have you realised that your money has become an illusion floating in cyberspace? Because you never actually get to see very much of it for real.

For buying and selling almost anything gumtree is a truly awesome site. And online airticket and movie bookings have become a breeze. I also enjoy Youtube come to think of it. And have you heard the SA version of Lady Ga Ga’s Pokerface? It’s called Pap en Vleis and it’s really funny.

Of course the energy I spend on all of these sites leaves me no time to waste on the millions of social networking tools like Blogs, Twitter, Linked In, Plaxo and Facebook (OK – I’ll admit I stumble reluctantly into FB about once per month) I also never get to visit the News Channels and Chat Forums and Flash Games and Celebrity Slobberers and Sleazy Porn Sites. Blind ek se!  But hey, here is a Real Newsflash – I just learned that you can now watch the daily news delivered to you by naked people! Yes, if you are over 18, not too prudish and keen for a different angle on the news dangle, click here.

Playstation:

My 9 year old son is already able to kill 2 374 of the enemy per hour. He has thumbs like vice grips. Yet recently, I watched in awe as my wife quickly covered his eyes when a pair of naked female breasts flashed across on our TV screen. I tried to reason with her that our son was far more likely to see real live boobs one day than actually kill somebody, so why not let him have a good look in preparation? Give him a head start so to speak. She told me to shut up and so we agreed to disagree on this touchy issue.

T.V.

I mostly watch rugby, my wife watches movies and my kids watch cartoon network. I tried to watch Ed, Ed and Eddie once but almost had an epileptic fit. None of us watches the news ever, it’s just too damn depressing. Soap Operas are also banned in our household – who wants to stare vacuously whilst drooling at “Days of other people’s lives?” DSTV continues to dish us up miles and miles of nothingness. Why don’t they let us choose our 10 or fifteen favourite shows – allow us to design a custom bouquet which we will really enjoy, for a reduced fee? Catch a wake up you Monopolistic Monolith!

Cellphones:

I smaak the Apple i-Phone stukkend –you can do absolutely anything with it. (Except make a simple phone call.) The Blackberry is now known as the crackberry because it is so addictive. I hate meetings involving people with Blackberrys cause they don’t pay me much attention – their shifty eyes and surreptitious toggly fingers are very distracting. Meanwhile my new Nokia takes photo’s and synchronises my contacts and diary through blueteeth with my laptop which is wirelessly connected to my WAN which uses an ADSL pipe to connect to the world wide wiki. Kan jy dit glo my Bru!!!

Relaxation:

Ja well no fine. So what do we do to relax, find balance and switch off from all this attractive and addictive technology? Here are some ideas:

1. I have been told to read 2 great books and I intend to do so just as soon as I can find the time. They are: the 4 Hour Workweek and Take back your LIFE.
2. Download a simple, powerful relaxation exercise from my website by clicking here. It’s free!
3. Resolve to only click send and receive only twice per day. Or automatically at 2 hour intervals (Easier said than done).
4. Set appointments with yourself for exercise, relaxation, vacation and family time etc. I colour code mine green in Outlook, so I can visually see if my life is balanced.
5. Read a non-fiction book which uplifts you. Click here for my recommended reading booklist.
6. Plan a weekend away or holiday – do it NOW (use the internet)
7. Invest / spend / live some quality time with your kids.
8. Tell a loved one how much they mean to you.
9. Listen to uplifting music.
10. Attend my one hour Presentation, Winning Ways to Work Smarter, or my one day Workshop on Time Management.

Also, if you have a moment to mail me, I would love to hear about how you deal with all these technology issues and what actions you are taking to balance your life.

Have to go now – my inbox is calling me. “I’m coming honey……”

Till next time

Braai Braai

Mark

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In many industries right now, making sales is very tough, in some cases almost impossible. Salespeople are frustrated and demotivated, sandwiched between the pressure of meeting targets and their customers’ reluctance to buy. Traditional sales techniques are not getting the required results.

We need to explore a new approach to selling, which utilises more of the current technology and psychology. This does not mean that the basics of selling have changed or should be discarded. It means that the psychology of buying needs to be taken into account.

Let’s briefly analyse traditional sales techniques:

Traditional sales techniques worked like this:

1. Set ambitious sales targets. It’s all about the numbers.

2. Prospect for customers, using cold calling techniques or an existing database etc.

3. Make appointments, be on time and dress the part.

4. Ask some clever opening questions, to establish rapport.

5. Present your offering to the customer. Be sure to know your product or service really well, including its FAB’s and USP’s. Be confident.

6. Be ready to handle their objections, have the right answers ready when required.

7. Try to close the deal, or agree to submit a proposal. Leave your corporate brochure and business card with prospect.

8. Follow up – try to close again. Be sure to know at least 5 foolproof closing techniques.

9. Be persistent – some deals take time to conclude.

10. Keep filling your sales pipeline by following the steps above.

By using the above approach you often end up with tons of unconfirmed proposals and very little cash flow! In the new world order, we need to adopt a far more creative, strategic approach to selling. I call it “High Touch – Low Pressure Selling”. Below is a brief summary of how it works:

High Touch – Low Pressure Selling:

1. Formulate a proper Sales Strategy. Segment your market correctly. Analyse your competitor’s activities. Decide what you really want – growth, survival, more market share or stronger relationships. Be realistic – don’t think you can achieve all of these at once. Understand your customer’s current reality – not just regarding your product – regarding their entire business or business division. Design a compelling offering, taking all relevant factors into account. Don’t just cut price – find ways to add real value. Exceptional Times call for Exceptional Ideas!

2. Research your prospects effectively. Visit their website, google their name, befriend their PA or colleagues, build up a clear picture of them before you make contact. Prepare a CRM contact sheet with the important info and attach your printed research.

3. Make the appointment. Don’t try to sell at this stage. Confirm the appointment by email and include an agenda for the meeting. Make the meeting time frame no longer than 20 minutes.

4. At the appointment ask some pre-formulated, intelligent “Power Questions” to gain an understanding of your prospect, their interests, their business and their current challenges. Pay careful attention to their answers and then ask deeper, more probing questions. Use the opportunity to gauge their behavioural style (Analytical, Amiable, Expressive or Driver). Adjust your communication immediately to suit their style. Try to avoid talking about your offering at this stage – rather be completely interested in their reality. Picture yourself as their partner or advisor; keep trying to understand their headspace. Give short verbal and body language responses to show you are listening actively. Make notes of the key points.

5. Wait for the opportune moment to speak about your offering. Again, try to do this using questions rather than statements. Gauge how much the customer knows already and just fill in the gaps. Don’t talk too much – watch their body language to see if you are losing them. Your offer must be compelling, as decided during your sales strategy session. This will give you natural confidence.

6. Be prepared for objections and draw them out in their entirety. Ask a reflective question or rephrase the objection to show that you empathise with the prospect. Commit to finding a mutually beneficial solution. Remember you are positioning yourself as a trusted consultant / advisor – not a high pressure salesperson.

7. In some cases, if the customer has a need and some budget, the close will now happen automatically. They will close themselves. If not, try one of the “Power Closes”. Be sure it is appropriate to the client’s behavioural style. If they request a written proposal, first make sure that they qualify for the time it takes you to prepare and send it.

When I sell, I prefer to quickly talk through how the proposal will be structured, with the key points, to ensure that they know what to expect. I also try to find out who will be involved in the decision making process – gatekeepers, influencers and decision takers. I also often talk about price at this stage, even if it is a ballpark figure. If they fall off their chair, we go back to step no.6.

Only send a proposal if you feel that there is at least a 75% chance of closing the deal. Remember – you are not in the business of sending proposals. You are in the business of Closing Deals. Make sure you leave with your prospect’s business card. Ask if they would like your card and/or brochure. Don’t waste paper by leaving your documentation if it looks like they will toss it the moment you leave. Find out how soon they require the proposal – then send it ASAP. Agree with the prospect exactly how and when you will be following up – set an appointment for the follow-up meeting if possible. This will be the closing appointment.

8. Send the proposal – make sure it is short, has quality graphics and looks professional. Also ensure that the numbers are easy to understand. In your covering mail, ask them to confirm that they have received the proposal. Enter the customer’s info into your CRM database. Within 2 days, you begin to send them High Touch – Low Pressure emails. The content of this high touch communication is determined by WHAT YOU UNCOVERED during your meeting with the client. These mails have nothing to do with your company, its products or achievements. They have to do with items of interest to the client. These communications can include; links to interesting websites, newsletters, valuable business information, statistics, information about their industry, ways to work smarter etc. This ensures that you deepen the relationship, stay top of mind and set yourself apart from the opposition.

9. Be persistent but patient – find the balance between pushing too hard and being afraid to close. Trust the high touch process – It works!

10. Keep refining the steps above and tweak the system to suit your selling style. Hold the attitude that you are here to build relationships, to sell, to add real value, to make a difference and to have some fun in the process. Keep investing in yourself – read books on selling, subscribe to magazines, grow your general industry knowledge, join a network, attend sales training courses (mine are really good!). Remember – Selling is a Profession. Professionals regularly upskill themselves – so should you!

Some are comparing the current economic crisis to the great downturn of 1929. Yet historically, in similar economic downturns, fortunes have been made, bargains have been bought, history has been shaped! Shaped by those who had the courage and the foresight to spot the opportunities – those who thought out of the box and became creative rather than reactive. Those who accepted that cycles are a part of all life, and went with the flow. Those who implemented exceptional ideas and actions!

Yours in Training

Mark Berger